Sure, get out a piece of notebook paper and make one column for pros, the other for cons, then decide if residency is for you and your family. Ha! After four long years of medical school and mountains of debt, you’d better hope that the “pros” column is way, way longer than the “cons” column, or else!
Patrick’s residency starts in July, with an orientation period in June, but for all intents and purposes, let’s just say July. I know he’s ready, yes, nervous, but well prepared and ready to start the next phase of his medical training, but am I ready? I think I am, but let’s see…
Cons (starting here so we can end on a positive note):
- The absence of husband.
Patrick has basically been off since the beginning of December. He has had a few rotations, but they’ve been super easy and the hours have been really short. He’s been an AMAZING help at home with the kiddos. I’d like to officially nickname him Daddy Magic (not sure why it’s not Magic Daddy, which makes more sense…but this is what I’ve decided). He has an absolute magic touch when it comes to feeding the Feisty Princess (Neala). She’s a challenge and he’s just the best with her. I guess she’ll have to learn to love me a little more if she doesn’t want to starve because Daddy Magic will be working 80 or more hours a week. Yay.Since our kiddos were preemies, we have to fortify my breastmilk so they get enough calories and extra good stuff (technical, I know) to grow big and strong, you know, like eating the crust on bread. Patrick is the food mixer. I HATE mixing the food for some reason. Maybe it’s that, without a doubt, breastmilk gets everywhere and the superfine formula powder seems to get everywhere too. Or maybe I just hate it. No real reason. But, with him being gone, I’ll have to mix the food so our bambinos get nice and chunky.
See, food mixing is a pain. The other thing I really hate is sterilizing all our bottles and nipples and other baby feeding equipment. Ugh. That’s Patrick’s job too, and he’s darn good at it!Our backdoor has been randomly opening in the middle of the night and it scares the crap out of me. What if it’s an intruder and the dogs decide not to bark to warn me and someone sneaks in and breathes on me while I’m asleep, or worse, breathes on the babies (weird fear, I know)…This is less likely to happen with my man in the house. Guess we should move the bat next to my side of the bed, just in case.
Also, showers. When am I going to shower if he’s gone all the time? Guess I’ll get some of that dry shampoo and some strong deodorant and call it good. - Lots of our medical school family is moving away.
Over the last four years Patrick has made some really good friends in school and I’ve become friends with a lot of them and their significant others. There’s really nothing like bonding over commonalities like partners who smell like they’ve been hanging around dead people in the anatomy lab all day. His closest friends matched out of state and will be moving in the next few months. That makes me a little sad.On a side note, one of his classmates has 3 year old twin boys and is moving to another state and I am so grateful, all over again, and again, and again, that I’m not in that boat! - Impromptu Outings and “vacations” are no longer.
Everything we do as a family that involves any kind of travel will have to be planned way in advance so Patrick can get the time off. And by way in advance, I mean that he’s already had to give the residency coordinator all the dates for the next year that he hopes to have off!The word “vacations” is in quotes because we don’t really go on vacations. I think the last vacation we went on was in 2008 for a wedding in Mexico. We’re cheap. And Poor.
Which brings me to the pros!
Pros
- A Paycheck
Patrick will start earning a paycheck. Before I retired and became a stay at home mom, I was the only one earning a paycheck, and working for a non-profit meant a pretty tiny paycheck. Then I quit working and now we’re poor. That will all change once residency starts. Residents don’t make a ton of cash money, but his starting pay will be more than I’ve ever made, so, I’ll say that’s an improvement. - Less Laundry
I really despise laundry. All the parts of the laundry: getting the clothes off the floor, putting it in the hamper, putting it into the washing machine, moving it from the washer to dryer (I especially hate this part because I’m so short that I have to hang over the side of the washer with both feet off the ground to get the freaking socks out of the bottom of the machine), taking it out of the dryer, folding, and the WORST part…putting the clothes away. Ick.But, now that Patrick will be gone quite a bit, and wearing hospital issued (and laundered) scrubs I’ll be dealing mostly with only my own laundry and that of two little babies. So, I’ll say 1/3 the laundry I’m accustomed to? That’s an improvement! - More Visitors
That’s right, I’m going to take full advantage of people feeling sorry for me because my husband is working 80 hours a week (they should really feel sorry for him), and invite anyone and everyone over to visit. And by visit I mean hold a baby, fold laundry (yessss!), do dishes, let me nap or shower (boom, problem solved!), or throw the ball for Stella, the world’s dustiest dog.I’m a very social person and it can be a bit isolating to be at home so much, so yeah, I’m looking forward to people just showing up. When will you be here?You’re uninvited if you or anyone in your family is sick. Bonus points if you bring food! - Guilt Free TV Watching
I can binge watch all the TV dramas and trash reality I want (assuming the kids sleep at some point)! Patrick and I have a few shows that we watch together and I try not to watch the other shows (that he mostly despises) when he’s around. So many programs to catch up on! - Breakfast for Dinner
I love breakfast, like, really, really love it. Sweet, savory, salty meat, how could you go wrong. I could eat breakfast for every meal, but not Patrick. He’s not into breakfast for dinner. I forced some waffles on him the other night and he was not a fan. He was happy to eat them the next morning, but that night I got the, “are you serious?” look and the text after I told him what we were having that said, “are you sure you don’t want me to stop and pick something up?” I’ll be able to eat breakfast whenever I want, yessss! - Holiday’s at Home
For the past umpteen years (since that’s how long we’ve been together), our families have expected us to be in about 10 different places during the holidays. Everyone is just close enough that all the driving is do-able, but certainly not all that enjoyable. (Don’t get me wrong, I love our families and our various holiday traditions, it just gets to be a bit much sometimes.) Patrick will likely not have holidays off, and we have two kids now…guess the party will have to come to us! And, another “con” solved–no need for those pesky roadtrips! - I’ll be in amazing shape.Since I’ll be doing most of the lifting, heaving, and pushing of two growing babies, I’m going to get HUGE. No need for a gym membership. Thank you babies!
The dude, hanging out with mom in the moby wrap for the first time…why have I never used this before?! - The biggest pro of all: When daddy is home, it’s going to be awesome and we will take full advantage of those times!We love you Daddy Magic and are so proud hand happy you’ve managed to do everything in your power to keep us here for the next 5 years!
Daddy Magic chillin’ with his homies.
And there you have it! The pros outweigh the cons of residency and we are ready to take on the next 5 years. Let’s do this. Boom.
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