5 Things You SHOULD Say to Parents of Multiples

It seems as though there are a million posts out there on the interwebs about what not to say to parents of multiples. Boring. I’m sure there are other posts similar to the one I’m about to write, but that’s OK with me.

Being a parent of multiples most certainly has its ups and downs, many of which I have yet to experience since our little worms have been home less time than they were in the hospital, but I have learned a thing or two about the kind of support we need to make life a little easier and the things people can say to us to make us feel like we’re doing alright as parents.

So, here are a few things you should say to a parent of multiples:

1. You look great!

Not, “you look great for just having had two kids,” or, “you look great considering how little sleep I’m sure you’re getting.” Just plain and simple, ” you look great.” Everyone likes a compliment, and even if you’re lying, it makes us feel a little better that you might have actually noticed the mascara or the clothes that maybe aren’t covered in spit up residue for the time being.

2. Your babies/kids are beautiful.

Again, everyone likes a compliment. Lots of multiples are premmies too and people think preemies look weird (and let’s face it, they sort of do for a little while, I know mine did, though I still thought they were the most beautiful little creatures in the world). There’s nothing better than someone taking one look at your baby and seeing their smile and having them tell you that what you created, no matter how early, is beautiful.

3. You have double (or triple, or quadruple) the blessings (or fun)!

It really is pretty fun having multiples. It is not a curse and parents of multiples are lucky–their kids have a built in buddy for life!

4. I’d love to help you with the babies, can I come to your house at ___ time and ___ date.

Go ahead and propose a date and time. When people offer to help me, it takes a lot of time for me to figure out when they should or should not come, and then to get back to them with that info. It’s much easier if someone gives me a day and time and I can tell them if that will or will not work. Don’t take a lack of response from a parent of multiples as a lack of interest, it probably just means they’re busy or sleep deprived and may have forgotten to return that call or email. Get in touch again with specific availability.

5. You’re doing a great job!

Juggling multiple kids can be hard and it’s always nice when someone appreciates that and, again, a simple compliment goes a long way! You don’t have to be specific, but telling a parent of multiples they’re doing a great job is very reassuring, especially on a hard day!

I had to throw in the obligatory pic of our twins, just because.

So there you go, now you’re armed with a few little things you can say to someone with multiples next time you see them. And remember, there’s no need to feel sorry for parents of multiples, we’re just the lucky parents of more than one kid!